Open Wide
No, my friend, I am not drunk. I have just been to the dentist and need not return for another six months! Is it not the most beautiful…
No, my friend, I am not drunk. I have just been to the dentist and need not return for another six months! Is it not the most beautiful thought?
Agatha Christie’s Poirot
It was a trip to the Dentist that prompts this week’s Reflection.
I am not really a fast-food ‘burger’ person. I know my kids felt deprived in their childhood in that MacDonald’s, Burger King, or the like were very rarely places frequented. Having said that, I do like a freshly well-cooked burger, especially if it’s a little different such as the pork and chorizo offering that I enjoyed when out with friends recently. On that note, a small Burger place opened recently in my hometown.
I’d heard good things of it, so I thought I would give it a go when between volunteering ‘shifts’ at the local Museum and don’t have a lot of time for lunch. Those good things were true.
This was not one of your, ‘here’s one I prepared’ earlier places. It takes around fifteen minutes to prepare the burger. It was worth the wait. A juicy, cooked to perfection burger that was flavoursome with spot-on seasoning. A brioche bun that was light to the touch and taste. In my case, it came with a fresh, crisp salad, and a sliver of Mayo (I don’t go heavy on Mayo). Twice the price of a typical ‘fast-food’ place but a more generous offering with infinitely more flavour.
What has this got to do with Dentists, you might ask? Sadly, while eating such a burger last Saturday lunchtime, I broke a piece off a tooth. I should add it had nothing to do with the burger. I’ve yet to crack or chip a tooth while eating the likes of hard toffee, pork crackling or a crisp apple. It’s always happened when chewing on a sandwich. Explain that if you will.
From an early age, my teeth have been something of a challenge.
My first visit to a Dentist was at the age of seven. Because of the concern that my first teeth were not relinquishing their positions to let my adult teeth occupy their space. The result was the extraction of five first teeth under ‘laughing gas’. I can still recall the smell of rubber and the sight of the mask approaching my face while the Dentist told me to take a deep breath. I don’t know how long I was under, but I recall visiting my grandad an hour or two afterwards. He investigated my mouth and likened it to the aftermath of a battle of the Great War.
Fortunately, that first visit did not leave me with Dentistry trauma. Especially given the number of times since that I’ve needed dental work. It did leave me short-changed, however. No tooth fairy appeared for those five teeth. At the rate of the time, I was down two shillings and sixpence.
Despite those extractions, my adult upper front teeth did not appear in the orderly fashion hoped. One of my canines didn’t show up at all. The result is the haphazard arrangement of the upper front teeth I have today.
In my early twenties, my then Dentist offered to address the issue by using braces, posts, etc. Deemed cosmetic, the cost would have been high. Around £1000 (at the time half a year’s salary), so it wasn’t going to happen. Not that it bothered me. My upper front teeth and I had gone through the harsh experience that can be school, as well as various courtships (does anyone still use that word?), and indeed, I’d been married for two years. It was by then too late for vanity.
However, I’m conscious of my upper front teeth. So, you won’t see me in many photos with an open-mouthed smile.
I suppose I must be grateful at my age that the teeth I have (one or two have fallen to extraction over the years) are at least my own. That said, those left have been drilled and filled, capped, and crowned. I’ve also had root canal treatment and other dental ‘joys’. Now that ‘laughing gas’ is long gone, it’s meant many, many Injections. In every part of my mouth, too, including the roof — that one was painful.
And how did this most recent visit go? Well. Is the answer. Last Monday morning, I called the surgery. Fortunately, they’d had a cancellation that day, so by 2:45, my mouth was under the detailed examination of the Dentist plus assistant. All very up close and personal. The result of that was the confirmation I’d lost part of the corner of a molar.
My Dentist asked, “Did I want a temporary filling and to return for the full repair, or should we get on with it now?”
“Now”, came my reply.
In the same length of time that I’d waited for my burger, the Dentist injected me, removed an old filling, and rebuilt my tooth. There followed the usual attempt to rinse one’s mouth out while half of it was numb, and as ever, I dribbled as a child. I’m sure dentists ask you to do that just for a bit of fun.
Anyway, that’s me sorted until the next time …
My music this week is another one from the Pogues, as Shane McGowan has even (or at least used to have) more of a dental challenge than I. Great songwriter, though, and this should get your feet tapping